Las Lagunitas eBulletin Board

Gene Morgan recently shared some photos he took around the property. I thought I’d share them with you.

Where can you get pasture raised beef/ grass finished?

Does anyone know when the vegetable truck will be returning to EDM?

Do they sell organic eggs/chicken?

Please respond by comment as the person who is asking did not leave a return contact.

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, ‘Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.’

– Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

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I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered.  But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: – ‘No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.’

– Eleanor Roosevelt

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Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen.

I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.

– Mark Twain

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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending;   
and to have the two as close together as possible.

– George Burns

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Santa Claus has the right idea.  Visit people only once a year.

– Victor Borge

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Be careful about reading health books.  You may die of a misprint.

– Mark Twain

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By all means, marry.  If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one,

you’ll become a philosopher.

– Socrates

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I was married by a judge.  I should have asked for a jury.

– Groucho Marx

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My wife has a slight impediment in her speech.  Every now and then she stops to breathe.

– Jimmy Durante

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I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back.

– Zsa Zsa Gabor

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Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups:

alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.

– Alex Levine

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My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.

– Rodney Dangerfield

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Money can’t buy you happiness …. But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.

– Spike Milligan

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Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was  SHUT UP   .

– Joe Namath

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I don’t feel old.  I don’t feel anything until noon.  Then it’s time for my nap.

– Bob Hope

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I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

– W. C. Fields

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We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.

– Will Rogers

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Don’t worry about avoiding temptation.  As you grow older, it will avoid you.

– Winston Churchill

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Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to wear out,

fall out, or spread out.

– Phyllis Diller

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By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.

– Billy Crystal

Bob Wallace is selling his 2016 Chevy Aveo. It is in great condition and is licensed in Mexico. Please contact Bob at bobjulie37@msn.com for more information. His condo is also for sale.

So we’re into our 5th month of fighting COVID-19. These words made me laugh but there’s a lot of truth mixed in to consider. . .

 1. So let me get this straight, there’s no cure for a virus that can be killed by sanitizer and hand soap?

2. Is it too early to put up the Christmas tree yet? I have run out of things to do.

3. When this virus thing is over with, I still want some of you to stay away from me.

4. If these last months have taught us anything, it’s that stupidity travels faster than any virus on the planet, particularly among politicians and bureaucrats.

5. Just wait a second – so what you’re telling me is that my chance of surviving all this is directly linked to the common sense of others? You’re kidding, right?

6. People are scared of getting fined or arrested for congregating in crowds, as if catching a deadly disease and dying a horrible death wasn’t enough of a deterrent.

7. If you believe all this will end and we will get back to normal just because we reopen everything, raise your hand. Now slap yourself with it.

8. Another Saturday night in the house and I just realized the trash goes out more than me.

9. Whoever decided a liquor store is more essential than a hair salon is obviously a bald-headed alcoholic.

10. Remember when you were little and all your underwear had the days of the week on them. Those would be helpful right now.

11. The spread of Covid-19 is based on two factors: 1. How dense the population is and 2. How dense the population is.

12. Remember all those times when you wished the weekend would last forever? Well, wish granted. Happy now?

13. It may take a village to raise a child, but I swear it’s going to take a whole vineyard to home school one.

14. Did a big load of pajamas so I would have enough clean work clothes for this week.

—It seems some statues are holding their own without any help.
Mostly just minor physical altercations so far…People may be taking down statues as a part of the protests and riots that have been happening recently.
Now statues around the world have apparently started to fight back …