This is Alan next door.
I have a confession to make. I’ve been riddled with guilt these past few months and have been trying to pluck up the courage to tell you to your face, but I am at least now telling you in text as I can’t live with myself a moment longer without you knowing.
The truth is I have been sharing your wife, day and night when you’re not around. In fact, probably more than you. I haven’t been getting it at home recently, but that’s no excuse, I know. The temptation was just too much. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apologies and forgive me. It won’t happen
Please suggest a fee for usage, and I’ll pay you.
Bob, feeling insulted and betrayed, grabbed his gun, and shot his neighbor dead. He returned home where he poured himself a stiff drink and sat down on the sofa. He took out his phone where he saw he had received a subsequent message from his (now deceased) neighbor.
THE SECOND MESSAGE
This is Alan next door again. Sorry about the typo on my last text. I expect
you figured it out anyway, & that you noticed that darned
Autocorrect changed ‘wi-fi’ To ‘wife’. Technology hey?